Saturday, July 6, 2024

D6x6 Pungent Porcs

For the generation of pig-orcs.

Previous orc content here & here & here.

Click the button below to get your porcs:


Special thanks to Spwack for the generator generator here: http://meanderingbanter.blogspot.com/2018/10/automatic-list-to-html-translator-v2.html

D6These porcs look like humanoid
1bristly wild boars.
2domestic pigs, fat and pink and squealing.
3warthogs, with their weird knobby skulls, and warts.
4red river hogs, strikingly coloured & tufted.
5entelodonts, the hideous hell-pigs of prehistory.
6babirusas, hairless with long tusks that sometimes grow all the way back into their heads.
D6These porcs are generally thought of as belligerent
1because in ancient days they had a grand civilization that challenged the gods - for their hubris they were cursed so that if they ever gathered in sufficient numbers to rebuild their civilization they would be possessed by the sound of war-drums and be driven to aimless conquest and pillage.
2because once a year their men enter a terrible frenzy, gathering into bachelor-bands to violently compete among themselves and drive others from their territory. Women and castrated men remain peaceable, and sometimes fall prey to indiscriminate retribution.
3because their economy is based on taking slaves and spoils and redistributing them to reinforce social bonds and debts.
4because their society is quite insular and xenophobic, so the interactions most people have with them are with gangs of bandit-exiles, or with watchmen telling them to fuck off.
5because they're instinctually driven to tussle themselves and those around them into a rigid dominance hierarchy - though on the other hand they lack the human instincts for revenge and spite.
6because there's been a war on with them for so long that few remember a time before.
D6These porcs are known to inhabit
1the wooded foothills of mountains, where goodly folk fear to tread unless to render tribute to the monstrous lords of their peaks.
2the savannah and steppe, riding burly and ornery elephant birds.
3uncharted lagoons and isles on the coast, going upriver in flat-bottomed barges.
4villages built around public wallow-pits, in a similar way to how human villages might be built around a bathhouse.
5megalithic ritual sites older than agriculture, gathering seasonally to drink beer, feast, marry, and worship.
6ziggurats with slanted levels, the zig-zagging ways up them confusing to outsiders.
D6These porcs practice
1self-scarification, encoding their names, relations, achievements, and so on on their hides, so that their stories will not be forgotten with their deaths.
2marriage of the spouses of and adoption of the children of those they honourably slay.
3an art of squealing-song which is grating to most others yet oddly beautiful to those of discriminating taste.
4some of the most advanced dentistry in the world.
5adiposarchy, rule by the fattest - as a correlate for wealth, a de facto oligarchy.
6ocular sacrifice - their eyesight isn't very good anyways, and its loss is more than compensated for by their senses of smell and hearing.
D6These porcs like to fight
1with hollow-tipped spears stuffed with noxious and poisonous mixtures.
2with their war-bats flapping about, biting enemies and shitting in their eyes.
3with charges and shield-walls which leverage their mass to batter and compress enemy formations.
4with great iron-shod clubs.
5from atop something between a chariot and a palanquin, carried by their fellows, if they are of sufficient status.
6with an axe-edged buckler in one hand that can chop weapon-hafts and flesh as well as parry.
D6These porcs believe
1that they are the only people in the world who came into existence outside the divine plan, and so are the only people who are truly free of fate.
2that humans cruelly split their children's trotters at birth to make toes.
3that pigs are the reincarnations of porcs who were foolish in life.
4that the sun hates them, and so avoid it when possible and wear wide hats when not possible.
5that a bald head is lucky, and so sometimes collect bald heads if they don't have one themself.
6that showing one's tail around strangers and acquaintances is shameful.

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