Monday, June 27, 2022

Some More Horsemen of the Apocalypse

Inspired by discussion on the GLOG server. Special thanks to Everythings and LichesgetStitches.

Git along little dogies, it's your misfortune and none of my own:


Behold! A[colour] horse!<br>The name of him who sat on it was [name].<br>He who sat on it held [item].<br>It was granted to the one who sat on it [power].<br>I heard [speaker] [ominous quote].<br>And all [follow] followed with him.

n orange

the News

a rusted scythe
a barbed spear
a pair of shears
a glaring owl
a blaring megaphone
a rabid pit bull
a roaring chainsaw
a gun firing wildly
a globe
a set of compasses
a wicked mace
an two-headed axe
a tattered banner
an infant by its ankle
a cracked mirror
a leaden crown
an empty cup
a grinning skull
a wriggling sack
a bloodied stone

swiftness to cross the whole of the Earth
some of the last words of history
mastery over many legions
knowledge of every evil
sight to reveal all things hidden and kept dear
to ruin good things
authority over a swathe of the earth
strength to defeat any army

the [number] living creature say
a voice in the midst cry out
the angel of the LORD announce
the head of the slain beast declare
the very stones rumble out
as if in my own thoughts:
all sleepers shriek
the doves call
the chorus on high sing
the splitting sky shout in a voice like thunder:

{ominous quote}
"Flee, and know the trampling of his brothers"
"It's happening"
"Your days are numbered. All days are numbered. Few now remain"
"Be afraid"
"The time for mercy is past"
"Start praying"
"Is this Biblically-accurate enough for you?"
"Sorry atheists"
"Be gay and do crime"


the Furies
the rising waters
nuclear fire
the deep state
the empire
the weeping ones
the gathering darkness
the self-appointed inquisitors
the killing machines
the living dead
the unforgiven
the meaningless cacophonies
the rulers of the darkness of the world
the winds of destruction
the idolators
the corpse-eaters
the swarming vermin
the screams of the dying

Friday, June 24, 2022

D6x6 Mystifying Myconids

Click the button below for your very own myconids:

Generator generator here:

D6These myconids have
1 a crown of crimson tendrils that makes them look quite fearsome.
2 wrinkles that make them look like a cross between a walnut and a brain.
3 teardrop-shaped bioluminescent nodules that sometimes break off and float away.
4 lacey skirts of hyphae.
5 frills that trail below their caps like tattered veils.
6wide pores that leak indigo ichor.

D6These myconids can
1 puff up rapidly, becoming temporary giants, but collapse soon after.
2 seemingly teleport by popping in and out of the ground - really they're translating themselves through the hyphaeic network.
3 survive decapitation and other sorts of dismemberment.
4 induce overproduction of chitin to organically petrify parts of their body.
5 speak with worms and beetles and all other detritivores.
6clamber over any surface by sinking their tendrils into it.

D6These myconids are vulnerable to
1 direct sunlight, which dries them right out.
2 confusion if exposed to certain scents which disrupt their pheromonal communications.
3 exposure to temperatures outside a narrow band, and so must spend much of their time underground, in controlled environments, or in otherwise temperate zones.
4 starvation if isolated from their hyphae, as they're unable to process food on their own.
5 dogs and hogs, which can sniff them out and devour them relentlessly.
6blights which leave meaty creatures untouched.

D6These myconids' society
1 teaches that individuality is an illusion, and that only the group is real.
2 is a crab-in-the-bucket scramble to earn recognition and a legacy within their short lifespans.
3 is built from the ground-up with limitless interconnection and redundancy.
4 is a nomadic trade empire, able to wander and integrate itself anywhere.
5 has exhausted itself with decadent celebration and monument-building.
6is nominally democratic, yet entrenched interest groups have decided its direction practically since its inception.

D6These myconids are
1 descendants of cultists who worshiped a fungal god who they believed could bring them to ultimate cosmic unity.
2 former fairies whose spirits got stuck in mushrooms while passing through a fairy-ring.
3 a latent adaption in all fungi, simply waiting for the right epigenetic trigger to show up.
4 the descendants of fungus that grew atop graves and absorbed the form and intelligence of the corpses buried therein.
5 an epicurean wizard's experiment in creating self-harvesting produce.
6an ancient species that has ruled over the great rot that has followed every mass extinction.

D6If eaten, these myconids
1 are addictively delicious, overloaded with umami flavour.
2 are powerfully anti-biotic, able to cure any bacterial infection.
3 contain spores that will survive their passage through your digestive tract. The spores will grow little myconids in your poop that will imprint on you like ducklings.
4 will chemically alter your brain to further their interests.
5 will launch your soul out of your body in a psychedlic astral projection.
6will literally poison the shit out of you.

Sunday, June 19, 2022

D6x6 Swooping Swanmays

Click the button below for a swanmay of your very own:

Generator generator here:

D6This swanmay’s swan form
1looks like someone wearing a well-made swan costume.
2is crystalline, resembling an ice sculpture, and leaves a trail of glowing motes in its wake.
3is albino, save for speckles on its chest the colour of blood.
4has a dagger-like beak and razor-edged feathers.
5is all the colours of the rainbow - the gayest looking swan you can imagine.
6has feathers as dark as a moonless night.
D6This swanmay’s human form
1is uncannily lithe and lanky.
2is that of a stately old woman, imperious and elegant.
3has the tell that they’ve got swan’s eyes instead of human ones, and so wears tinted glasses when they want to be inconspicuous.
4is muscular and wiry, with matted hair and wild eyes.
5is rosy-cheeked and buxom.
6is deathly pale and has hair that trails down to her ankles.
D6This swanmay is
1a swan that was magically uplifted by a deity to be one of its servitors.
2a star that was cast down from the constellation Cygnus for space-crimes.
3a formerly-ordinary mortal who became afflicted with a terminal illness, and turned to the fairies who lived in the nearby woods for an unconventional cure.
4a character from an opera who was brought into reality from the imaginary realm by an obsessed & arcanely-inclined conductor.
5a spirit representing humanity and nature in mutually-beneficial harmony - a spirit of the garden and the grove.
6a princess cursed by a rival over a marriage prospect.
D6This swanmay can
1heal wounds with her tears - but they must be tears of genuine grief.
2grant the gift of flight to those who join her flock.
3shroud her surroundings in total silence, or unleash a deafening honk.
4hex anyone who harms her to encounter pernicious thorns whenever they walk through or touch vegetation.
5speak with all birds as though they were not twittering idiots.
6ward ghosts and demons away from anyone carrying a token made from her feathers.
D6This swanmay hangs about
1a pond in the middle of a royal hunting preserve that’s being occupied by a peasant rebellion.
2a castle abandoned because it was built for fanciful aesthetics over defensibility.
3a stone crossroad that’s fallen into disrepair, become overgrown and sunken into muck.
4a beached gambling barge, wiling away the days playing solitaire with moldering cards.
5a placid lake with bygone evils sealed within, sacrifices and idols tossed to its bed, leaking their energies into the water over centuries like toxic waste.
6a haunted glade where the heartbroken go to commit suicide.
D6This swanmay is looking for
1a worthy bearer for a magic sword she’s been charged with keeping.
2the descendant of a family she owes a mortal debt to.
3someone willing to take on a monster that lairs in the same area.
4a few venal individuals willing to take on the job of pranking a local dryad who she’s got a rivalry with.
5someone who can chart a safe migration route for her swan friends.
6a lover to share her days with.

Tuesday, June 14, 2022

D100+ Weighty Werebeasts

Click the button below for a werebeast of your very own:

Generator generator here:

The code:

This werebeast is a were[beast].<br>This werebeast became a werebeast [became]<br>A quirk of this werebeast is [quirk].<br>[spread].<br>[cure].<br>[wereweak].






due to the curse of a notorious, nature-venerating cult.
because of the blessing of an obscure animal-god.
because of boundary-pushing experiments in transmutative magic.
due to obsessive emulation of their favourite animal.
after they accumulated enough merit as an animal to gain the ability to assume human form.
after eating the meat of a spirit that had assumed physical form.
by being born into a clan of fellow werebeasts.
due to possession by an animal whose ghost they failed to propitiate after killing.
after drinking a tainted potion made with beast-blood.
as the perfection of their animal-based martial arts style.
due to para-temporal contamination from an alternate timeline where their animal form was the dominant species.
long ago, when the line between human and animal was more fluid.
after a berserker rage so deep it broke their humanity.
thanks to a poorly worded wish.
due to the magic of a fairy who wanted to teach them an important lesson. Important to fairies, at least.
because the angel that carried their unborn soul couldn’t decide whether to bring it to a beastly or a human infant.
after being infected by another werebeast.
due to genetic tampering to cure a congenital disease.
after being used as a living portal to the Beastlands.
due to their reflection being captured, consumed, and replaced by a cursed mirror.

This werebeast has a weakness to [material], and [exposure] it [weakness]

This werebeast cannot transform if anyone is looking at them
This werebeast transforms involuntarily if sufficiently agitated
The remains of an animal which they can turn into can grievously harm this werebeast if wielded against them
This werebeast is vulnerable to overstimulation of their animal senses
This werebeast possesses a talisman, which if destroyed would trap them in their animal form
This werebeast is poisoned by whatever would poison them in either form - such as chocolate for a canine or fresh water for a saltwater fish
This werebeast can sometimes forget their human self if they remain in animal form for too long
Normal animals are wary, fearful, or even aggressive toward this werebeast
Transformation is excruciatingly painful for this werebeast

that they transform into an oversized version of their animal form
that they transform into a group of their animal form
that they can transform only part of their body into their human or animal form if they so choose
that wounds or other such negative effects on one form are shucked when they change into their other form
that they can command other animals of the sort they transform into
that they can communicate telepathically in their animal form
that they can exist in a sort of super-position of their animal and human forms simultaneously, taking on the traits of whichever would be more advantageous in each circumstance
that they can transform their surroundings into the preferred environment of their animal form
that they can track anyone whose flesh they've tasted to the ends of the earth
that they can rapidly regenerate if they've got enough food to eat to make up for lost mass
that there's a magical shroud about them that inhibits people connecting the actions of their human and animal forms
that if killed they will return as a peculiar sort of vampire

hawthorn wood

on contact with
in proximity to
when wounded by

they're forced to transform into a wretched mishmash of parts
their flesh blisters and smokes
they're struck with mortal terror
they're lulled into torpor
they lose the capacity for higher thought

This werebeast can't spread their condition by any means
This werebeast can spread their condition to others through their bite
This werebeast can spread their condition to their children, whether adopted or biological
This werebeast can spread their condition to those who drink their blood
This werebeast's condition will be contracted by their killer unless their killer performs certain austerities
This werebeast's condition can be attained by anyone who grinds up their bones and snorts them
This werebeast's condition can be contracted by anyone who drinks fresh rain from their footprint
This werebeast spreads their condition to anyone who lives in close proximity to them for long enough
This werebeast can spread their condition like an STD
This werebeast can spread their condition by sowing one of their teeth in the flesh of their target

This werebeast can be cured if someone else agrees to take on their condition
This werebeast can be cured by imbibing a toxic mixture that might well kill them in the process
This werebeast can be cured if they live in a heart of civilization without transforming for a year
This werebeast can be cured if they find true love
This werebeast can be cured if they kill one hundred animals of the same sort as their animal form
This werebeast can be cured by flaying them in their animal form, revealing their human form within
This werebeast can be cured by a wish or other similarly potent magic
This werebeast cannot be cured of their condition by any means. It is an inextricable part of them
This werebeast can be cured if the first of their kind is slain, which will also cure all others of their kind
This werebeast might lose their power (and weakness) if they violate the cycles of nature sufficiently

Saturday, June 11, 2022

D20 Reasons Why This Flying Castle/Mountain/Etc. Is In The Sky, Though By Common Sense It Should Not Be

1. It is carried aloft by the Simurgh's flock on three-score beating wings.

2. It is tied to a great big balloon which eclipses the sun and most of the rest of the sky.

3. The earth has rejected it and it has nowhere else to go.

4. It's caught in the slow, broken tractor beam of a wrecked extraterrestrial craft in orbit.

5. It's being held as collateral in a bargain by a tempestous cell of air elementals.

6. Someone spilled a barrel of proprietary flying ointment on it and a coven of witches are very unhappy about that.

7. It contains magnetically-anomalous ores that suspend it in the planet's magnetosphere.

8. It's attached to innumerable kites catching the wind.

9. It's held up by an invisible giant.

10. It's captured enough dew to bear it up as the droplets return to the moon.

11. It's infested by buoyant slime-molds which rise to a high point to sporulate as the final stage of their life-cycle.

12. It's covered in windmills, which are linked to an enchanted engine that converts their angular momentum to upwards linear momentum.

13. It's been frozen in spatio-temporal stasis after being flung into the air by a volcanic eruption.

14. Sky-pirates are abducting it with gossamer hooks.

15. Lots of rockets, strapped on haphazardly.

16. It contains a portal to another dimension, and has its foundation upon the ground there.

17. A sort of aerial Charybdis tried sucking the place up into its maw, but ended up choking on it.

18. A mathemagician has made their lair there, and altered its coordinates to place it in the sky.

19. It's made of a porous sort of stone with many internal bubbles of hydrogen, making it lighter-than-air, and very explosive.

20. It's an artifact surviving from a pre-gravitic universe, and so does not recognize gravity's dragging tyranny.

Friday, June 10, 2022

D6x6 Xeno-Swarms, Such As Might Be Found In The Zerg, Tyranids, Flood, And The Like

Click the button below for your very own all-devouring alien swarm:

Generator generator below:

D6This xeno-swarm originated 
1 as escapees from an experimental super-soldier program meant to create warriors who could repopulate and resupply themselves anywhere.
2 as a natural species that evolved on a planet with such harsh conditions that only the most extreme creatures could survive.
3 as an attempt to synthesize a genetic code that scientists interpreted in the cipher of the cosmic background radiation.
4 as bioweapons laced as living minefields by a defeated and retreating galactic empire to deny their lost territories to all others.
5 as a decadent sect of a precursor civilization which decided that the only delight left for them to experience would be to become feral beasts.
6as a species that shared a hive-mind, and so also shared the psychic trauma that mutilated their hive-mind and turned them into what they are now.

D6This xeno-swarm's appearance
1 is reminescent of naked mole-rats, wriggling piles of pink flesh with folds in skin parting to reveal toothsome maws and devilish appendages.
2 is the inverse of Geiger-esque. They sort of resemble plushies, and might be cute if they weren't trying to tear you apart.
3 is gelatinous and ever-shifting, each organism of the swarm itself composed of a zoogleal colony of sub-organisms that can swap to the role of any other sub-organism like stem cells.
4 combines features of crocodiles, sharks, ants, and just about every other hundreds-of-millions-of-years-strong survivor.
5 is that of a Cambrian explosion menagerie, a parade of bizarre, unintuitive body plans.
6is disturbingly similar to crabs, revealing the terrible universality of carcinization.

D6This xeno-swarm is greatly feared
1 for its ability to spawn kaiju that by conventional understanding of biomechanics should collapse under their own weight.
2 for its ability to subvert people into its agents by chemical and surgical means, like a much more complex version of those wasps that hijack cockroaches.
3 for its adaptability, quickly generating new organisms to respond to any new environment or threat.
4 for its strategy and coordination, every component organism able to act in perfect concert with every other.
5 for its hyper-corrosive venom that can melt through flesh and metal alike, and which its creatures can spit with great range and accuracy.
6for its smallest component organisms, which gather in gargantuan swarms and can strip cities bare of life in hours.

D6This xeno-swarm spreads 
1 by infesting hosts as a parasite and mutating them from within.
2 like a weed, sending its roots deep throughout a world and periodically blooming out a horde from that network.
3 by chewing through hyperspace like rats through drywall, creating interplanetary tunnels and occasionally collapsing the foundations of local space-time.
4 like interstellar burs, hitching a ride on other species' spaceships.
5 by not really spreading at all. In fact, it's already present on countless worlds, and only appears to spread when these dormant nests are awoken.
6through meteorite-spores they launch en masse into the void.

D6This xeno-swarm’s weakness 
1 is that its higher thinking is outsourced to certain cerebral organisms. Take those out, and the rest of the swarm in the vicinity will go catatonic or go on an indiscriminate rampage.
2 is that despite appearances all its organisms are biologically very similar, and so the swarm is susceptible to infectious diseases.
3 is that it struggles to comprehend technology. Even just opening a door instead of needing to smash it open can be a crapshoot for its organisms.
4 is that with the right pheromonal or ultra-sonic signal they can be lured wherever you want them.
5 is its tremendous hunger. If not able to secure new food supplies for itself the swarm will swiftly resort to auto-cannibalism.
6is that it possesses an animalistic wariness around fire.

D6A proposed solution to this xeno-swarm 
1 is to upload all sapient lifeforms into robot bodies or simulated realities and wipe everthing else out to deprive the swarm of sustenance.
2 is to hybridize other life with the xeno-swarm so they wouldn't be seen as prey.
3 is to create another, even deadlier xeno-swarm that's programmed to predate it.
4 is to create totally sealed and surveilled habitats that the swarm couldn't hope to infiltrate.
5 is to create a Judas-organism that would destroy the swarm from within.
6is to initiate a program of universal drilling and augmentation so that every individual outside the swarm is more than a match for any organisms within it.

Thursday, June 9, 2022

D20x5 Supreme Space Marines

Click the button below for a force of space marines of your very own:

Generator generator here:

D20These space marines are
1 the children of venerable warrior-clans, inculcated from birth with their ideals and discipline.
2 exposed to a virus that causes extensive mutation when they're recruited. Those whose mutations are non-viable, or even just not beneficial enough, are culled.
3 turned into unrepentant killers by the combination of immersive virtual simulations and mind-melting doses of psychedelics.
4 uplifted gorillas who've been modified to have a fully bipedal stance.
5 dead soliders revived and rewired by the injection of a miraculous serum.
6 war-slaves who've had their very genes twisted to adapt them to the battlefield.
7 subject to brutal surgical enhancement, their musculo-skeletal systems almost completely replaced with stronger synthetic tissues.
8 fanatics abducted from a lost colony that went feral, and led to believe that they're in some sort of martial afterlife.
9 cultists who believe they're blessed by a god of war, and honour it with rites of carnage.
10 clones of physically exceptional specimens grown in tanks in large batches. Only the top performer in each batch is allowed into their ranks.
11 infested with bio-engineered tumours that give them an incredible ability to bounce back from injury.
12 recruited from some of the most dangerous places in the galaxy, where simply surviving to adulthood is proof of merit enough to join.
13 neo-humans sent back in time to ensure their own future existence.
14 conscripted orphans indoctrinated to see their fellow marines as their family.
15 human brains implanted into android bodies.
16 implanted with an A.I. companion that watches their every move and explodes inside their skull if they ever betray their superiors.
17 metabolically adjusted, turned into candles that burn bright and fast, able to move and react blindingly fast yet aging rapidly.
18 injected with artificial super-hormones that turn them into jacked giants.
19 ritualistic cannibals who believe that by eating their enemies they can take their power and wisdom.
20criminals that have had their nervous systems hooked up to control rigs.

D20These space marines serve
1 a pacifist hive-mind as ultra-violent deviants severed from the whole in dutiful damnation.
2 the highest bidder as elite mercenaries.
3 a revolutionary government, and are primarily occupied by hunting down remnants of the previous regime.
4 a more technologically advanced alien civilization as expendable human auxiliaries.
5 themselves, as the upper ranks of a Prussian-esque army-state.
6 as the personal army of an immortal aristocrat.
7 as the garrison protecting the border with wild space from invasion.
8 as the outward face of a xenophobic, isolationist polity.
9 as the in-house private military of a mega-corporation.
10 as the militant arm of an interstellar church.
11 a digital gestalt of uploaded scientists, philosophers, and engineers who promise utopia by any means necessary.
12 a defeated and dismantled nation which they seek to restore.
13 a distant master as conquerers carving out new territories.
14 as the fearsome enforcers of international law.
15 the greater good, as determined by their utilitarian calculation-engines.
16 as defenders of honest folk against rampant piracy in an anarchic bubble of space.
17 as privateers plundering riches for a trade empire.
18 a galactic tyrant (who they plan on couping) as bodyguards and stormtroopers.
19 on the front lines against exponential von Neuman probes and other existential threats.
20their empire as a vanguard that's reputed as never having known defeat.

D20The space marines are immediately recognizable
1 by the massive pauldrons on their power armour suits, which contain autonomous turrets.
2 by the extravagant horns on their helmets - really electronic warfare transceivers.
3 by their glittering, gem-like cybernetic eyes.
4 by their monomolecular-edged greatswords.
5 by their hydraulic gauntlets that could punch holes in a tank.
6 by their auroral cloaks, wreathes of magnetically-manipulated plasma that protect them from energy weapons.
7 by their back-mounted rocket-wings that let them soar above the fray.
8 by their chimeric companion-beasts.
9 by the red and gold paint they slather on all their stuff.
10 by their elephantine battle-standards that can shoot laser beams from their eyes.
11 by their tattoos, made from the ashes of their fallen comrades.
12 by the silvery fog of micro-machines that follows in their wake.
13 by their electrolaser discharge packs that can call down lightning.
14 by their barbed, prehensile mecha-whips.
15 by the snarling face-plates of their NBC suits.
16 by their bulky gyrojet rifles that shoot shaped-charge explosives.
17 by the scorpion-tail attachments on their armour that can fire envenomated darts.
18 by their blood-streaked mohawks.
19 by the cobra-like movements of their characteristic martial art.
20by their booming war-songs, tuned infrasonically to induce panic and disorientation.

D20These space marines' headquarters
1 is on the ocean floor of a planet almost totally covered by water, with an atmosphere consumed by perpetual typhoons.
2 is a bunker-complex within a mountain range on a radioactive hell-world ravaged by hordes of mutants and flesh-scouring, cancerous dust storms.
3 is on a fragment of a shattered ring-world.
4 is hidden on a frozen rogue planet drifting in the darkness between stars.
5 is an aerostat-habitat floating in the upper atmosphere of a storm-wracked gas giant.
6 is a moonlet that's been hollowed out and converted into a semi-mobile fortress.
7 is built into a canyon created by a glancing shot from a planet-cracking weapon.
8 is at the heart of a populous arcology where every three-dimensional city block has its own militia, all armed to the teeth.
9 is a satellite in an incomplete Dyson swarm, the sole safe point around its sun, which is constantly spewing out solar flares.
10 is built atop a mountain of bones they've collected.
11 is a corpse-world overrun by toxic fungi, formerly united by a single vegetable-consciousness that was killed by the space marines.
12 is on a desert-world that's home to aggressive silicon-based life that can tear armoured vehicles apart with their crystal talons.
13 is deep within labyrinthine catacombs excavated by a now-extinct alien species.
14 is on a low-gravity world, among the boughs of a cloud-drinking giga-tree.
15 crawls on titanic treads with the twilight-band of a planet close to its sun, outracing the iron-smelting heat of its day.
16 is on an obsidian ruin, the remains of a planetoid that ruptured and spilled its molten guts into the void.
17 is the rusting hulk of a crashed spaceship.
18 is on a hollow planet constructed by hyper-capable precursors with a white hole at its core. The reverse time dilation caused by the white hole allows the space marines to swiftly (relatively speaking) build up their forces.
19 is within a dense web of carbon nanotubes patrolled by spider-drones.
20was recently blown up by infiltrators, and they're scrambling to find a replacement.

D20These space marines' preferred tactic
1 is to ride into battle on motorcycles and microlight aircraft like futuristic knights.
2 is marching as closely as possible behind a wave of obliterating artillery-fire.
3 is to lay down overlapping fields of voluminous fire to make the battlefield a bullet hell.
4 is to rapidly develop field fortifications to turn any confrontation into a siege.
5 is stealth, bringing assassinations and creeping terror, defeating the enemy before they even realize they're under attack.
6 is to win air superiority then rain bombs and paratroopers down on the enemy.
7 is to foment discord and rebellions, divide and conquer.
8 is to tunnel beneath the enemy and erupt among their ranks.
9 is to lure enemies into traps and ambushes.
10 is to concentrate their armour and firepower to smash through enemy lines.
11 is wild experimentation, discovering the next paradigm of combat before anyone else has the chance.
12 is honourable and epic duels that will be written glowingly about for ages to come.
13 is shock and awe, putting the fear of god into their enemies' hearts.
14 is to make the very environment inhospitable to their enemies. Unleashing chemical weapons, breaking up the ground, and so on.
15 is surgical strikes and special operations.
16 is to destroy their enemies' logistics and starve them out.
17 is to engage from the furthest possible range with missiles and snipers.
18 is to fearlessly wade into the thick of things.
19 is a precise balance of combined arms, presenting no weakness.
20is to mob and overwhelm with more-or-less human waves.