Special thanks to Spwack for the generator generator here: https://slightadjustments.blogspot.com/p/generator.html
Click the button below for a monster of your very own:
Special thanks to Spwack for the generator generator here: https://slightadjustments.blogspot.com/p/generator.html
Click the button below for a monster of your very own:
Format taken from Rise Up Comus here: http://riseupcomus.blogspot.com/2022/11/rpg-blogs-as-fantasy-taverns.html
Aesthetic: The furniture and decor are old, but well cared-for - musty, but not moldy. Behind everything is a story. Its tables are round, separate enough for quiet conversation at one to be just barely audible at another if you strain to listen. The chairs are plush, easy to sink in to. Both hold secret compartments, drawers popping out with the clicking of tiny latches and buttons, messages carved seamlessly among embellishments.
Regulars: Intellectuals and artists - intellectuals who'd never be granted tenure at any reputable university, artists whose work won't be displayed in fancy galleries in their lifetime. Scruffy people, people with day jobs that don't involve much art or deep thinking, who accomplish ten times more in their field than those who've been publicly and popularly accredited. They compete and intrigue among themselves - subtle wars of style and taste conducted right under the nose of the unwary, who might be swayed as unknowing pawns.
Proprietor: A demure man simply called "Phlox", for the flower he keeps pinned to his lapel. He rhymes with the best of the artists, debates with the sharpest of the intellectuals, riddles with the shadiest conspirators. Once, way back in the day, the intrigues of his tavern broke out into open violence. Phlox stepped in to defuse the situation, and took the stem of a wine-glass through his throat for the trouble. The next day he was back, smiling and laughing with a circle of old-timers, the phlox on his chest fresh as ever.
On Tap: Sweet and cozy fare - hot and spicy chocolate, mulled wine, energizing tinctures, fruitsome liquers. The food is simple by comparison: breads, cheeses, and salads on little platters.
Aesthetic: A bonkers motley, ever-changing by the day. Often garish to the point of hurting to look at for too long, but just as often appealing in a way you couldn't have imagined before you walked in. Small and crowded, but not cramped - the more you interact with the space, the more you find yourself fitting in like the missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle. The only things you can be sure not to expect are the dreary and the flatly traditional.
Regulars: A peculiar bunch, each with their own distinct quirks and obsessions that by some combination of accident and ingenious design mesh together more often than not.
Proprietor: Max-A-Million, who may be some kind of giant, robotic beetle - it's hard to tell under all the prostheses and cybernetics. He claims to have been a scientist once, somewhere strange and far away from here. His former discipline is esoteric, hard to grasp for most, but he's able to apply it to the operations of his tavern in fascinating ways. Keen to argue on any of a thousand topics, but rarely takes offense. Has a good eye for people even when he seems caught up in some occult reverie.
On Tap: Like the decor - never the same twice, yet always at least a little zany. You might come in and be served a peanut butter squid stout, a fizzy durian-and-vanilla cocktail, a soup using a deep-fried beaver tail as its bowl, liquid rubies fired into your mouth with a blunderbuss, to name some very few options.
Aesthetic: Damp and drafty, hewn right from the cold, pale stone. Furs are heaped here and there for the taking, and a stiff shot to warm you up is provided at the door. Everything's built for someone half-again as big as you. Everyone within wears a mask - never unique to the individual wearing it, but some triangulated combination of animal and colour and expression.
Regulars: A tight-knit and exclusive bunch. Regimented in all their behaviours within the tavern's confines - the songs, their nicknames, the symbolism of the mask they wear and the drinks they sip. Those who deviate from the exacting standards are ostracized, or physically cast out if they persist. Feathery, spiral-bound books written in a smattering of personal ciphers encode the rules of the place, recorded over the generations of its patronage.
Proprietor: Never seen, at least not explicitly, but hinted at - the regulars can breathlessly tell you a hundred stories of his exploits. "The God in the Curves" is one of his names among them. The bar-top holds an ashtray that hasn't been used in some time. To use it or empty it yourself is taboo. His typical manifestations, according to the tavern's regulars at least, are an invisible wind, or a masked individual indistinguishable from anyone else in the establishment.
On Tap: Red wine, or cocktails of myriad exacting specifications. Food is provided on demand, to its orderer's specifications, dumped out the door of an iron dumbwaiter - however it's bound to the same baroque bureaucracy as everything else - if you order anything fried or basted in butter, you will be exiled, never to be allowed re-entrance. Olive oil seems fine however.
Aesthetic: Rustic and utilitarian - save for the flares of red, swatches of penants and banners taken from battlefields past swaying over the crowd. Laid out like a squashed horseshoe - letting those who just need a hot meal come in and out, with room to the side for those looking to put their feet up, and to the back for those needing a place to sleep for the night.
Regulars: Anyone and everyone who can respect the space and each other. The place is run more like a charity than a business - pay if you can, but still help yourself if you can't. On more than one occasion an aristocratic would-be freeloader has been tossed out into the neighbouring alley. Regulars back each other up in the establishment and in the streets, sharing resources, education, and cracking the occasional head that's asking for a cracking. Conversation within tends to turn fiery, only to be defused by the profusion of free booze.
Proprietor: A stout and scarred man called "The Dandy". Veteran of a dozen revolts and revolutions - uses the spoils and salaries he won from those conflicts to fund the place. Often overheard griping about something or other, but drops his own complaints quickly to help those in need. Has a fondness for astronomy, and will let those he's warmed up to borrow his collection of telescopes and star-charts.
On Tap: Ale, moonshine, salty crackers, salt pork, salt fish, and heaping helpings from any of the pots of perpetual stew the tavern has kept going every day since its founding.
Aesthetic: Roomy woolen revival tents filled with delicious smoke from barbecue-braziers, wagons with bands and magicians performing circled 'round. A circus where the marvelous and unusual can show off, be at home. The tavern's nomadic - rolling it up and rolling out is the work of a morning. It can pop up as a welcome sight just about anywhere, accompanied by its herd of singing sheep.
Regulars: Weary travelers stopping in from the road, pilgrims who aren't sure where they're going in the end, country folk dropping in for some novel entertainment.
Propietor: A gentle and gregarious halfling by the name of Smix Chael who can switch on his larger-than-life preacher-man voice in an instant. Smix is a former adventuring cleric who gave up that dangerous life to spend more time with his family. He still performs exorcisms, turnings, marriages, and other such services pro bono.
On Tap: Clean, cool water and various juices - it's a dry establishment. Plates of mutton and veggies roasted over smoky wood-fires. There's also a boulder-sized hookah, the smoke of which takes the forms of its exhalers' dreams, but there's usually a long line for it.
Per request of Josie on the secret GLOG discord.
These names are in no particular order, and come with no claim to accuracy - only what I've compiled from various sources. Skipped over alternate spellings of the same name unless I forgot to.
Click the button below to receive a name, or scroll down for the full list:
Special thanks to Spwack for the automatic rollernator: http://meanderingbanter.blogspot.com/2018/10/automatic-list-to-html-translator-v2.html
Culture that never goes outside without their heads covered - believe their ancestors offended the stars, and will destroy them if they make themselves visible - they’re right
A portrait so perfectly representative that it develops its own intelligent spirit. Years pass, the portrait’s subject grows older, and the portrait becomes disgusted with its subject, believing it must kill them and become the “true” person. Uses madmen obsessed with it, art thieves, gallery owners, etc., as the tools to do it.
“Sparklock” weapons of the post-apocalypse use batteries to ignite their powder
Order of assassins who wire their pistols up around their arms, blowing their veins open after they take a shot
The Insane Clown Posse’s dark carnival as a domain of dread
Domain of dread set in/around mine or something along those lines, curse is the miners become more and more suffused with the stuff they mine - crystals splitting skin, hands fusing into clubs of ruddy ore - becoming monsters, a new crew needing to be recruited by more-or-less coercive methods in a grim and futile cycle
Mareld - the sea glow
Acthnici- the salamanders-over-the-water
Reifs of the upper air (like reef + reify) - lush ecologies where the air grows so thin that ideas can push through into the material - flocks of micro-national principalities scatter before a swooping Empire, an old and milky-eyed Justice has Corruption and Venality perch on its back, picking up the scraps of its mistargeted kills
-Waterspouts are bridges to the middle air - and the middle air is home to zeppelinoid life derived from throat-inflating frogs, air plankton, and suchlike
A barren old tree. Impale eyes upon its branches to see throughout time, across the whole lifespan of the tree.
The Rotary Rosary - a divine implement that lets one outrace even death
"they wait patiently for the nightmares that will wake them into a more passionate world"
A silent knight in dented armour sitting at the entrance of a dungeon, cutting down any monsters that try to leave
"Uncontacted Amazon tribe", but it's workers who've become lost and feral in the back shelves of an Amazon warehouse
Murrain - various infectious diseases afflicting sheep and cattle
GLOG class based on self-mutation
Boss/prisoner at bottom of dungeon able to project illusory duplicates higher up to hinder, confuse, maybe even help
Cyberspace ecosystem - insurance rate hikers stalk prey and get them into accidents, hatecurse bodyjackers seek a way into flesh to torment and kill their target, firestorm sporulators overclock digital infrastructure until the heat build-up explodes its 3-D printed offspring into the upper atmosphere, extremophile - lures and isolates people into ideological cysts, escalates and infects surveillance when their prey gets put on watchlists
Something-crawling across the ioun stones orbiting an archmage's head
A head in the sky like a low-hanging moon - decapitated monsters roam the streets - if the head can see you, then so can the monsters
Stilt-walking priests venerating the crucified corpses of giants
The Ambiguous Latch - turns windows into doors and doors into windows
Mortar-martyrs sacrifice themselves to repair the walls of the Bastion Against the End of the World
The owl-boys - awful children who perch in the woods, big black eyes and heads turned all the way around, muttering with mouths full of black fangs like a dozen beaks
Headless statue in dungeon, skulls and heads can be placed upon the stump of its neck and interrogated as speak with dead, but pissing off the head has chance of causing statue to animate as stone golem or whatever
Rune on mural depicts sequence of rooms in dungeon to move through to open secret door/disable a powerful wandering monster/etc, it's shaped like a criss-crossing squiggle or whatever
Limbic Lombrics, ethereal spell-fauna that can take up residence even in the brains of non-wizards, feeding off strong instincts and gut feelings and expelling arcane effluvia when its host feels fear or anger in the form of poltergeist activity
Hedgehog-riding hedge-knights of the prickley wilds, wearing sugar-glazed flower blossoms as armour and the horns of beetles as lance-tips
Sundial puzzle - riddle that points to number on the dial, opens secret entrance to dungeon or something at that time of day
-trap in the sundial dungeon: roof studded with lenses that focus sunlight into burning beams during daytime - same hallway is filled with shadows or similar light-fearing creatures at night - breakings lenses is easy way of disabling trap, but the optics themselves are valuable treasure if pried out
-puzzle-room in the sundial dungeon: shadows within the room are solid structures (shadows cast by obstructing light, not shadows as the monster), can rearrange objects or stand in place to cast shadow over mist or smoke to create a bridge to get treasure or somesuch
Reindeer-riding bandits raiding the sled-trains which criss-cross the frozen oceans of the utter north - trains carrying lightning-struck amber, luxurious furs, the fist-sized pearls of white oysters that cling to the underside of ice shelves, the anagathic sap of the eternal pines, scrimshawed whale ivory, auroral lights captured in crystal prisms, meteoric iron, idols of bone and hair which contain killing spirits
A helmet mounted with a walrus's head, its tusks hinged and attached to the visor
-halflings riding gazelles, using slingshots tied between their horns to launch payloads
-burbur-skin boots, impervious to acid of all sorts
To add to the "what use for languages besides being able to talk to stuff" pile:
-Goblinish: escalate any conversation to violence with vile insults, understand and potentially replicate blueprints to eccentric & risky devices
-Draconic: force enemies who've failed morale check to pay tribute, cook any raw meat that touches your tongue
-Elven: blend speech into the sounds of natural environments (wind, birdsong, etc.) rendering it imperceptible to non-Elven speakers, elven caligraphy can turn any object into a scroll at reduced expense
-Dwarven: can "speak" to artificial objects simply by understanding their construction to a great depth, cause rockslides by shouting in dwarven atop a hill
Trap & inter-dungeon level passage: machine that replaces your blood with some alchemical anti-freeze, freezes you solid, and places you on a conveyor belt that goes down into some vault. Thawing with significant source of heat revives you, but improper handling carries risk of snapping bits off.
Device like a glass harmonium strummed by a stilleto - used by Pandemonium-cults to communicate with their fiensish patrons - requires stabbing a victim in the throat, stealing their voice but leaving them alive, projecting it across the astral membranes of the planes
-cultic activities suggested by people showing up mute and amnesiac
Souls & afterlife in fantasy setting are artificial, virtual constructs created by some precursor civilization - souls are magical recordings of minds meant to be plugged into their various devices and machines or used for computations - various cults and gods were also created to cultivate particular sorts of minds/souls for various ends: war-cult for minds that would be implanted in battle-drones, ascetic-cults for regulatory systems, and so on
Near-future sci-fi: disrupted ocean temperatures and whatnot creating constant hurricanes, megastructural wind turbines set up at flooded coasts to diminish them and harvest power - ecosystem of genetically-engineered "vortex birds" circle in the perpetual aerial gyres around these installations, clearing debris and wildlife before it can jam up the workings
"Swift as the shooting star, that gilds the night
With rapid transient Blaze, she runs, she flies;
Sudden she stops nor longer can endure
The painful course, but drooping sinks away,
And like that falling Meteor, there she lyes
A jelly cold on earth."
-William Somervile, The Talisman
All slimes, oozes, etc. in the dungeon are originally descendants of fallen star, and may contain some gelatin-matrix-embedded remnant of celestial wisdom and power (the worst falling stars, and slimes descended from the same, are the offspring of Caiphon, Gibbeth, Nihal, and all the other Loathsome Lights)
Witchcraft as primitive biological weaponry - witches are warty due to viral infections, keep cats around as toxoplasmosis reservoirs, "love potions" are solutions containing behaviour-modifying parasites
Does the demon-bone sarcophagus imply the existence of an angel-skin cradle?
Modern fantasy/horror dungeon concept: ruin-complex built into or encased in ice shelf revealed by global warming, have to make your way through it to the good stuff within while it's calving off into icebergs
Magneto-shrikes rule the wrought iron corridors of the now-abandoned lake district, the finials of its fences adorned with the impaled corpses of their prey
A festival that's also a dungeon - like hero-quests from Glorantha - monsters are celebrants also participating in the festival, those killed wake up in the morning with the worst hangover of their life, layout is the same as the village, with room-houses connected by tent-tunnels, everything returns to normal at sunrise
Diabolists sometimes and silently tolerated by rulers because they make the best lawyers - one overlooked clause or loophole and it's their ass getting dragged down to hell
The lantern oil used by adventurers is rendered from the fat of hyochakushin, hence its efficacy in banishing the darkness of the underworld and burning its denizens
A mythic fantasy Dyson sphere - a golden cage once used by a crazed archmage to imprison the sun god, plunging the world into endless night
The anti-outlaw - a criminal geased Clockwork Orange-like into being totally unable to break any laws
Entry on the encounter table: literally just the witches from Macbeth/the moirae
Sci-fi horror oneshot: trapped aboard space station in decaying orbit with alien biohazard, escape pods won't launch while alien's loose, have to quarantine, kill, or jettison it within time limit to survive - or perhaps improvise your own way to survive atmospheric re-entry and rapid lithobraking
Pinwheel-shaped ferns that concentrate silicates in the edges of their leaves to make them cut like razors - spin rapidly in the wind, winding up their stalks for an equally-rapid counterspin when the rotation reaches its limit - a brutal countermeasure against grazers that makes crossing fields of the things quite dangerous
The navelgazer monks, ordinarily pacifists, can make their introspection literal and turn themselves inside-out, becoming visceral war-beasts
-the shy baron wants you to steal some of their bile to make himself a confidence-boosting Jekyll & Hyde-type potion
The Confederacy of Humps - a symbiotic micro-civilization that inhabits the fatty humps of camels - war against their former compatriots who now live below the dunes in the sweet abdomens of giant honeypot ant repletes
Bellows-beasts with cone-shaped bodies contracting sporadically and faces like a furry Hyottoko hunt goats at cliffsides, using their immensely powerful breaths to knock their prey onto the stones a long way down below - the royal forgemaster wants you to capture one alive, believes it's the key to making the perfect sword
Expedition to the Barrier Peaks-style adventure but you can repair the spaceship and go to space for further spelljammery shenanigans
Themes for GLOG wizard schools: snowglobes or other such tiny representations of things - making things tiny, making tiny things big, etc., caterpillars/butterflies, slimes, clay/bricks/pottery, stereotypical real world magician tricks like pulling rabbits out of hats, technology-indistinguishable-from-magic-type stuff, ninja wizard, bard wizard (but not lame), wizard school where every spell combines or accumulates toward an endgame like lichdom (but not lichdom) - maybe like a total survival/travel suite for various planes, wizard school that begins with a "when all you've got is a hammer, every problem starts looking like a nail"-type spell and the rest of their spells are about turning different sorts of problems into nails, frog wizard, shrek (storybook version) wizard, dracula wizard, origami wizard
The rangers of the snowy wastes string their bows with the beards of defeated warlords of that place, decorated with gold rings and elaborate braids, imbued with their stolen arete
Funnel idea: characters are anthropomorphic animal-people in whimsical forest - adventure reveals that they are in fact trapped in the magical hedge-maze of a bunch of wizards who created them and are gambling on their deaths & exploits - end is escape into wider world where they're occult bizarrities
Neo-Flintstoneian Western - alternate history wherein the oil barons of America discover a way to reconstitute the lifeforms that make up their oil - wagon trains pulled by triceratops, cowboys on raptor-back, artillery platforms mounted on argentinosaurus howdahs - rural populations fleeing loosed prehistoric beasts into fortified cities, fed on dole of proteinous paste made of reconstituted giant insects, cowed into dangerous industrial-proletarian servitude by Rockefeller rock-shakers - secretly-reconstituted sapient troodontids scheme in the shadows, playing every mammalian side against each other
Sword & sorcery setting based on electric universe/Saturnian sun historical conspiracies - set in our distant past, on the primordial Earth orbiting the brown dwarf star Saturn - a plasma-cocooned twilit world of lush red vegetation, exposed lost continents, lower gravity, and gigantic animals - societies led by doomed & decadent astronomer-kings living under the shadow of Earth's catastrophic orbital re-alignment - Lawful = Past, Saturnian, Chaotic = Solar, Future - floating vessels with spider-silk sails catching telluric currents
In more out-there vanilla-ish fantasy, dwarves are often depicted as made of stone or metal, and elves as plants - what would giants be by the same logic?
-colossi, huge statues of bronze or stone or whatever else brought to life? - like Talos, full of animating ichor?
-clouds/living storms descended to earth, great billowing grey hair, voices like thunder, lightning flashing in their eyes - volatile little deities who must be appeased to bring rain or withhold floods
-primordial man, closer to the cosmos, attaining longevity by abstaining from divisionary reproduction and other such asceticisms
Dungeon challenge run: tile limit (can only walk on so many 5-ft squares
Special thanks to Spwack for his generator generator here: http://meanderingbanter.blogspot.com/2018/10/automatic-list-to-html-translator-v2.html
Click the button below for your very own giff:
|D6||This giff has|
|1||a puckered scar from their right brow to their cheek, and a Fabergé-patterned glass eye peering from their socket.|
|2||their family heraldry carved into their tusks.|
|3||a lower jaw that's been replaced by a steel prosthetic.|
|4||garish star-sailor's tattoos they had done all across their body as an adventurous youth.|
|5||a beloved pet hamster they like to carry around on their shoulder.|
|6||a spear-head once wielded in an assassination attempt on them, now used as a tooth-pick.|
|D6||This giff wears|
|1||a navy coat pinned with many medals awarded during their military service.|
|2||a tricorne hat with the quad-finned feather of some alien beast pinned through it.|
|3||a monocle inscribed around its gold rim with astrological symbols.|
|4||a woolen scarf and an aviator's cap and goggles.|
|5||overstretched scarlet silk stockings up well past their boots.|
|6||a brass pocketwatch necklace they constantly adjust to count down to their predicted time of death.|
|D6||This giff was|
|1||a mercenary who'd fight at any odds for the right price.|
|2||the disgraced former captain of a spelljammer fleet.|
|3||a famed conquistador whose adventures were greatly exaggerated.|
|4||an idly-rich big-game hunter.|
|5||the overseer of a moon-tea plantation.|
|6||a merchant-marine who cut deals with pirates.|
|D6||This giff prides themself|
|1||on always keeping their promises, and their threats.|
|2||on being a crack shot.|
|3||on loyal service to their superiors and magnanimity toward their inferiors.|
|4||on their ability to endure pain and deprivation.|
|5||on their raw strength and wrestling ability.|
|6||on never running from a fight.|
|D6||This giff's shameful vice|
|1||is visiting non-giff dollymops.|
|2||is their indulgence in the ecstatic mysteries of foreign cults.|
|3||is their gluttonous hunger for sweet melons.|
|4||is their cycles of drunken laxity followed by self-flagellating re-dedication to chauvinistic giff values.|
|5||is a cloying addiction to star-opium.|
|6||is high-stakes gambling.|
|D6||This giff is currently|
|1||a pit-fighter in the gladiatorial arena on a decadent alien world.|
|2||port-bound, and attempting to bring together a crew and a ship.|
|3||attempting to retire as the owner of a void-crocodile farm, and failing at it miserably.|
|4||using their connections to smuggle illicit goods into giff-controlled space.|
|5||trying to charm a giff debutante, whose father disapproves of their courtship.|
|6||training a squad of deniable assets they'll lead on a clandestine mission.|
Like Monsters & Manuals' post here: Animal Name Monsters, except these are derived from literal translations (partially from google) of French animal names instead of Japanese ones - correct etymology not guaranteed.
Bald Mouse (chauve-souris: mouse)
HD 3 + Swarm AC as flesh ATK 1d4 nibble MOV as jogging man ML 7 INT beast
Animate Skin: A swarm of bald mice can flow into a hide, fur coat, bearskin rug, or the like, and animate it as a simulacrum of the beast it once was (with the same stats and so on). Damage to this animated skin is not carried over to the swarm within unless it is dealt with fire, acid, or suchlike.
"Bald" is a gentler way of saying these creatures are practically flayed - their skin a wet and transparent membrane filled with nerves like little white worms. These nerves connect to each other, dissolving the mice's individual identities into their teeming swarm, and to dead remnants in old furs, leather, and so on.
HD 2 AC as chain ATK 1d6 proboscis drain (equal damage to charisma, no benefit to rest on same day you've been drained) MOV as hummingbird ML 7 INT person
Butterflies with bodies the size of a football (American) and faces reminiscent of a squalling baby, firmly in the uncanny valley, fixed in plates of chitin.
They seek to drink dreams out of people's heads with their barbed proboscis, processing and regurgitating these dreams as high-octane fuel into great cocoons the night butterflies weave among the boughs of wild peach trees.
These cocoons are rockets. The night butterflies hope that with them they can return to the moon. None have gotten quite that far yet.
Scrubber Rat (raton laveur: raccoon)
HD 4 AC as leather ATK 1d8 bite MOV as running man, climb like monkey ML 8 INT clever beast
Rodents as big as a black bear, with fur like steel wool and tails tipped with feather dusters. Enchanted creations of the ataxophobic court wizard of Castle Peltou. Attack the dirtiest member of the party first, ignore those who are freshly bathed, compulsively clean up messes even before defending themselves.
Green Ouchie (grenouille: frog)
HD 1 AC as flesh ATK 1d4 slap MOV as walking man ML 5 INT beast
Acid Trail: Green ouchies leave an acidic trail of slime behind them like the world's nastiest snail. Stepping in this trail deals 1d4 damage, or destroys your footwear instead if you've got it.
Veil of Innocence: Green ouchies can only be seen by children.
Look like crude, amoebic doodles of houses, dogs, parents holding hands, and suchlike. Loathsome vermin able to slop their way into pantries and granaries impenetrable to all other creatures.
Green ouchies spawn only in a certain week once a year, and across cultures this week has become a time for adulthood initiation rites and celebrations, children being given heavy sticks and told to let loose on the pests.
Ending Eagle (aiglefin: haddock)
HD 1 AC as chain ATK 1d10 decapitation (half damage if neck is covered) MOV as bird ML 6 INT clever beast
Possess wicked talons they hold together to form a curved guillotine. Soar high above their chosen prey, waiting for a moment of inattention to swoop and slice. Ending eagles won't descend so long as they're being watched, but can dive in the moment you blink.
Blood-Knit (sanglier: boar)
HD 5 AC as leather ATK 1d12 digest (can only be used on immobilized targets)/Bloody Spray MOV as walking man ML 7 INT beast
Sticky Blood: Anything which wounds a blood-knit becomes stuck to it by its sticky blood, and a contested strength check against a strength of 12 must be made to remove it. When the blood-knit reaches 1/2 HP this strength increases to 15, and at 1/4 HP it increases to 18.
Bloody Spray: Sprays sticky blood, coating a 5x5 area. Anyone moving through this area becomes stuck, requiring a contested strength check against a strength of 12 to escape. When the blood-knit reaches 1/2 HP this strength increases to 15, and at 1/4 HP it increases to 18.
A mass of red and blue veins clumped together into a form between a pygmy elephant and a terrestrial starfish. Once the servitors of a god of blood, a deity cast down for its savagery. They linger still near that god's shrines, collecting sacrifices pointlessly for their dead master.
Water Hooter (blaireau: badger - mind you the French haven't seen butchery like this since the battle of Agincourt)
HD 3 AC as chain in water, as unarmoured on land ATK 1d6 claw MOV as fish in water, as crawling man on land ML 7 INT as person
Has 3 MD with which it can cast Control Water (per Many Rats on a Stick). Miscasts cause it to take 1d6 damage. Dooms cause it to dissolve into foam & die.
Hairless blue-grey folk without nipples or belly buttons and mouths crowded by a trio of black beaks instead of teeth.
Can speak Common in a hooting, whooping voice. Believe they are the masters of all water, and exact heavy tolls for crossing rivers and fishing in lakes. Leave the drowned and bloated bodies of those who don't pay up bobbing at the edges of their territory like buoys.
While seeking out these monsterizable translations I also stumbled upon some fun translations/etymologies that didn't make the cut:
-A term for a pedant in French is "un enculeur de mouches" - literally: a sodomizer of flies.
-A gooseberry is a "groseille à maquereau", a "mackerel currant" - perhaps in the woods there are bushes which grow fish-like berries, which are able to pop off the bush and flop over to the nearest river to swim away from browsing animals and spread seeds some great distance
-The French word for dragonfly is "libellule", which wiktionary tells me is from the Latin libellula - however "libellula" is not a word that's been around from the Romans' days - it was coined by Carl Linnaeus based on "libella" (a carpenter's level). Assuming some wiki-nerd isn't taking the piss, what the hell were French people calling dragonflies for centuries before Carl came along?
-Hermit crabs are "bernard-l'ermit": Bernard the Hermit - perhaps they'd get along with St. Bernards, little crabs carried around in their whisky casks
-There is a sort of beetle called a cockchafer - do not want to encounter one of these - much more pleasant "hanneton" in French
-"Manchot", the word for penguin, is also the word for a one- or no-armed person