D6x6 Bigfoots, Sasquatches, Yetis, & Other Such Primatoid Cryptids

Click the button below to generate your cryptid:

Special thanks to Spwack for the generator generator here: http://meanderingbanter.blogspot.com/2018/10/automatic-list-to-html-translator-v2.html

D6	This primatoid cryptid has
1	tangled locks knotted around strips of vegetation like an organic ghillie suit.
2	gangly-long limbs, and a bulbous head that droops from its neck like a gourd on a vine.
3	tarsier-big eyes, spaced apart like car headlights and backed with light-reflecting tapeta.
4	atrophied sensory organs, and symbiotic micro-monkeys swarming about its body, tugging its fur to guide it and chittering in the holes of its ears to relay sounds.
5	a cartilaginous skeleton. It moves like a rubber toy and can squeeze through any hole big enough to fit its throat-ripping canines.
6	a shockingky-human face - though in truth this is a fleshy camouflage-wattle. Their true face is far less anthropomorphic than any other primate's.

D6	This primatoid cryptid inhabits
1	trackless old-growth forests.
2	the depths of putrid swamps.
3	a webwork of mountain caves.
4	a reach of hostile taiga.
5	a stretch of savannah.
6	sewers, abandoned warehouses & factories, and other such locales on the margins of human society.

D6	This primatoid cryptid is seen by humans
1	as a breeding population of chimpanzees that escaped from a circus.
2	as a metaphor for innocent & untamed humanity used by local poets.
3	as one of those new pizzly bears or something of the sort.
4	as a spiritual guardian of sacred nature.
5	as a hallucination of drug-addled hippies.
6	as a hoax invented by locals to drum up tourist business.

D6	This primatoid cryptid sees humans
1	as particularly-delicious food.
2	as deformed children.
3	as incomprehensibly-advanced aliens.
4	as objects of proto-religious fascination.
5	as intruders into its territory.
6	as fools seduced by sedentary & technological civilization.

D6	This primatoid cryptid is
1	invisible to those who don't believe in it, thanks to its psycho-refractive fur.
2	surrounded by a cloud of pheromones that induce confusion and amnesia.
3	capable of mimicking voices and other sounds, and of extracting memories from the brains it eats.
4	highly resistant to small-caliber firearms thanks to the density of its bone & muscle tissue.
5	capable of channeling the static electricity which builds up in its fur into stunning or even killing bolts.
6	covered in porcupine-esque needles which through muscular contractions it can launch like crossbow bolts.

D6	This primatoid cryptid is hunted
1	by a once-beloved influencer whose star is fading due to controversy, convinced that finding proof of the cryptid is the key to reigniting their fame.
2	by the head of a some-race-or-another supremacist militia who funds their operations through the sale of meth - sampling their own supply has plunged them into stimulant psychosis.
3	by a big game hunter and amateur alchemist who's kept themself in prime physical condition since the early 1800s by extracting essential materials from their own descendants.
4	by the retainer of a Saudi prince who wants it collected as the ultimate exotic pet.
5	by the possessed host of a parasitic wasp which can only truly reproduce in the flesh of the cryptid.
6	by an aging celebrity skeptic who received undeniable evidence of the cryptid, and now wants to eliminate it to affirm the entirety of their career.