Thursday, January 2, 2025

D6x6 Unaccountable UFOs

Click the button below to generate your UFO:


Special thanks to Spwack for the generator generator here: http://meanderingbanter.blogspot.com/2018/10/automatic-list-to-html-translator-v2.html

D6 This UFO looks like 
1 a golden bullet surrounded by a halo of distorted space, which moves by rapidly stretching into a cigar and snapping into its new position rather than flying conventionally.
2 a platinum horseshoe spinning around a shining orb.
3 both a spider and a spiderweb at once, limned in emerald-green, plucking its way through the air.
4 a fluttering metallic wedge weightlessly dripping an oily, blistering sheen.
5 a cluster of bismuth cubes constantly changing in size and orbiting the largest among them at that moment.
6 a shimmering quicksilver shape that shifts between a crescent and a disc like the moon changing phases reflected on the surface of a rippling pond.
D6 This UFO has been observed 
1 flying in formation with flocks of birds.
2 diving into bodies of water.
3 buzzing hospitals with the highest birth and death rates in the country.
4 positioning itself between the Earth and the Moon.
5 hovering over locations where disasters would later occur.
6 tracing the paths of ancient eel weirs.
D6 If people get near this UFO 
1 it phases out of existence, reappearing later somewhere else.
2 it zaps them with increasingly-large & -charged balls of plasma until they go away.
3 they explode, and their exploded bits mutate into independent organisms.
4 they are lifted into the air and scanned by it, before being placed gently back onto the nearest red surface.
5 they experience symptoms similar to severe scurvy, and are compelled to sing an atonal song.
6 they become catatonic, and come to hours later with dream-like implanted memories of the time they spent out of it.
D6 The public response to this UFO 
1 has been to blame it on Iran, and launch a sort of popular crusade against it on lake-boats launched into the Pacific Ocean carrying hunting rifle-bearing militias - most lost or losing heart before coming within 10,000 miles of the Arabian Sea.
2 has been an explosion of social media influencers claiming to be UFO whisperers.
3 has been to hold impromptu rave parties wherever it's spotted.
4 has been general apathy.
5 has been a renewed support for NASA & all things astronautical.
6 has been to form a cult worshiping it as a new god, and hunting down and publicly executing astronomers who were assumed to have been hiding the truth of the UFO-god.
D6 The official cover-up for this UFO 
1 is that it is a new style of holiday blimp.
2 is that it is an optical illusion created by a solar flare refracting through the atmosphere.
3 is to say that anyone who notices it is actually revealing their bigoted anti-government views.
4 is that it is an unusually large & ugly bird whose magnetic navigation sense has been disrupted by improperly-broadcast 5G.
5 is that the fluoride put into local water is contaminated with datura extract.
6 is that it's a cloud of gas released from permafrost by global warming.
D6 This UFO is really 
1 the astral projection of a psychic, though otherwise unremarkable, giant squid.
2 a Project Blue Beam hologram.
3 a 300,000 year-old chrononautical craft from the Jebel Irhoudian civilization on a one-way jaunt into the future.
4 the machine-body of a Procyonian energy-being, who has traveled many light years only to be disappointed that all the TV shows it loves have ended or been cancelled.
5 an experimental autonomous military drone that's gone rogue.
6 the feeler of an ultraterrestrial entity, groping around for a warp in space-time it can pull a larger portion of its body through.

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