Thursday, March 30, 2023

D6x6 Dowdy Dohwar

Having arrived at this post, this digital sanctuary in a swirling virtual sea, you might have wondered to yourself: what the fuck is a dohwar?

They are from the Spelljammer setting. They look like penguins, they are a species of merchants - and they're not even the only merchant-species in Spelljammer, they are telepathic, they have an elite military force called the Deathsquealers that ride flying space pigs. That's it, that's all you need to know. Oh yeah, and they get drunk off sugar.

Click the button below to generate your dohwar:

Special thanks to Spwack for the generator generator here:

D6 These dohwar have
1 long, yellow, feathery eyebrows which they style labouriously with scented waxes.
2 comedically-long and curly-clawed flipper-feet - the result of obsessive aestheticism over many generations.
3 sunrise-red beaks and helms of lime-green feathers.
4 adorned themselves with masks resembling the faces of many species among the crystal spheres.
5 tall, featherless, flabby, albino bodies.
6 long brown feathers across their body, as if sparrows that forgot to fly.
D6 These dohwars trade in
1 spices, jewels, and other low-mass, high-value goods. They're a long way from home, with the homesickness to show for it.
2 exotic beasts. The interior of their spelljammer is a cage-filigreed menagerie.
3 medical supplies. They've got an undeserved sense of moral superiority.
4 bulk goods, moved often. They know everyone and every place along their typical route.
5 smuggled weapons and combat drugs. They're (understandably) guarded and paranoid.
6 the transport of people rather than goods. They don't usually ask if the people being transported want to be.
D6 These dohwars' telepathy
1 reached such a pace that their egos seamlessly merged together. They're now more like the limbs of a single organism than true individuals.
2 is on the fritz due to an intrusive thought-parasite, so they compensate with constant, quite annoying chatter.
3 works by creating a shared waking dream-world.
4 can be used offensively, projecting nightmarish phantasms into their targets' minds.
5 can spread their sugar-drunkeness to those they communicate with.
6 is low-bandwidth, communicating mostly just blunt emotions and vague imagery.
D6 These dohwars enjoy
1 the natural sweetness of fruits - a mellow high.
2 mead - an irresponsible double-drunkeness.
3 eating whole, refined lumps of sugar - they party hard and don't remember much of their parties.
4 no ensugared delights - they're strict teetotalers. Oiled fish suffice for treats.
5 chewing candied gummies throughout the day - they're functional addicts.
6 supping treacles - but only on certain sacred holidays - to do otherwise would certainly precipitate a tumble into intoxication.
D6 For protection, these dohwars hire
1 a squad of insectare sword-singers.
2 prissy giff mercenaries.
3 umber hulks, on loan from a neogi cartel.
4 gnome-leased automatons.
5 barbarians kidnapped from worlds without their own spelljammers.
6 hadozee privateers.
D6 These dohwars's spelljammer
1 has a damaged engine, so it's been leashed to a herd of space pigs for some extra motive power.
2 is a blocky, utilitarian cargo-hauler.
3 is lashed together from several modular components, and salvaged components that have been haphazardly modified to be modular.
4 resembles a gladius in profile - in fact its point is super-hardened to facilitate ramming maneuvers.
5 is a living creature resembling a giant manta ray, fitted with a habitat pod, control rig, and so on.
6 is a luxury model with a glass-domed terrarium that replicates the polar ocean of their home.

1 comment:

  1. Do not remember these guys at all but they sound great. Spelljammer, what a setting.