Picture Pong With Phlox: About To Go Forrest Gump On This MFer

Semiurge swallows, speechless. The sound in the room dies down and all we hear is a faint heartbeat as semiurge stares at the magnificent post.

Look at that subtle mythological referencing. The tasteful length of it. Oh my God, it even has premises...

In the exhibit before you, you may behold perhaps the most popular of the old saints here at the zoo. This is St. Andromedus, former patron of those who travel by sea. He was canonized in living memory at the Third Convocation of Apsidis.

 

During his fleshly life St. Andromedus demonstrated heavenly favour, most famously in his drowning of the burning martyrs while constructing the Moreve Canal. Lesser-known but no less worth remembering demonstrations include his calling of the comet upon the camps of the Tiegmen, and his raising of the sequestered fleet from the sea-bed.

You may see the esteem in which the Amendment holds St. Andromedus by the luxury and spaciousness of his exhibit. Rest assured that he is able to dedicate every moment of his perpetuated existence to contemplation of the will of the archons. His canonization was deemed to be merely a sub-lunary error of the Ouranic Church, as universal protection of sea-travelers would inevitably extend undeserved benefit to pirates and smugglers. As such, please feel free to proffer tithes and veneration to St. Andromedus to further ease his supra-humane retirement.

If you require protection for sea travel, that charge has been secularized and granted to the Thin Sea Company. A clerk for the Company can be found towards the exit.

Please be warned that due to Anti-Simonian attacks all exhibits here at the zoo have been encircled with Class IV wards. Do not touch the exhibit or approach within ten feet with ill intent. We maintain the sole and true orthodox position on the imperishability of the old saints as determined by the Council of Antarea. Accordingly they will not be disposed of until it can be irrefutably argued that their imperishability is the result of sorcery rather than miracle.

Bonus; Three Treasures You Definitely Shouldn't Steal from the Exhibit of St. Andromedus:

-His sword, Water Memory, which bubbles away the flesh of aquatic monsters it cuts into sea-foam

-His Bitter River Chalice, which poisons bodies and barrels it's used to drink from

-His sapphire spyglass, which can see the winds that will blow a day in advance, and even the little winds from the breath of living things when focused

What rhymes with man-tree? Is that even a man-tree you see here below? Only Phlox can know.