Monday, February 25, 2019

D20x5 Calibans, Igors, Renfields, & Other Wretched Servants

Gooble gobble

D20This Wretched Servant Serves...
1A sociopathically greedy business mogul.
2A lich reduces by its enemies to a crawling, mummified hand.
3A megalomaniacal troglodyte who uncovered ancient entombed technology.
4The spoiled half-human child of a fairy-prince.
5A crazed paladin who has cybernetically modified themself into a model of the world that their faith demands should be.
6A hellspawned cambion who has embraced their vicious blood.
7A doddering old wizard whose evil is now as much the result of senility as malice.
8A bandit-chief with pretensions to warlordism.
9A hyperintelligent ectoparasite that desires to make all humanity its cattle.
10A semi-divine whale who has grown to loathe the works of landlubbers.
11The ultraterrestrial harbinger of an invasion from the acid-soaked realm of the machine elves.
12A clanking sapient automaton whose heart is a doomsday clock that ticks ever closer to the end of days.
13A vizier with ambitions to take the throne for themself.
14A criminal mastermind with fingers in every rotten pie.
15A pirate-lord who’s sailed stranger seas than the seven known.
16A prideful priest whose veneer of virtue hides sickening hobbies.
17An alien organism they’re nurturing back to full, titanic might after its mutually mangling impact with the world.
18A heretical conspiracy set to overthrow the current order.
19A fraying tyrant with ever-teetering delusions of towering grandeur.
20The matriarch of a clan of inbred assassins with weaponized mutations.
D20This Wretched Servant’s Behaviour...
1Is tailored to their audience to best misdirect and manipulate.
2Is generally cringing obeisance.
3Is chortling, callous joie-de-vivre.
4Can be summed up in cycles of excess and apathy.
5Is hammy, scenery-chewing, a self-conscious performance.
6Is always testing and abrasive.
7Is fatalistically depressive.
8Is blandly bureaucratic.
9Is compulsively self-doubting.
10Is a deceptive, self-serving tangle of lies.
11Is vegetatively slothful when they’re not performing their duties.
12Is talentlessly poetic.
13Is unwaveringly, untiringly loyal.
14Is contemplative yet impulsive.
15Is glory-seeking and self-destructive.
16Is amorously awful.
17Is simmering aggression that’s always rising to boiled-over fury.
18Is wry amusement with everything around them, masking a prickly, fragile ego.
19Is hyperactive hyperfocus on each new topic raised to their attention.
20Is a sculpted facade of virtue and honour.
D20This Wretched Servant’s Deformity Is...
1Toes on their hands and fingers on their feet.
2Upside-down ears that leak earwax constantly.
3The left half of their body is half-again as large as the right.
4Slit pupils like a lizard’s.
5Purple skin like a full-body bruise.
6A single scaly horn growing out the side of their head.
7Uncannily perfect beauty.
8The doll-like stillness of their face.
9Veins that wriggle like worms beneath their skin.
10A wrinkled throat that bulges like a frog’s when they inhale.
11Hairy palms.
12Serrated, wedge-shaped teeth.
13A smattering of benign teratomas.
14An elongated spine that’s folded like an accordion.
15Hair that grows in porcupine-spines.
16A mouth that opens much too wide.
17A fleshy, prehensile tail.
18Copious acne that sprouts in symbolic patterns.
19A nose that’s just two flat holes.
20A neck, arms, and legs that are twice as long as normal.
D20This Wretched Servant’s Madness Is...
1That they are the true master and their master is really their servant.
2That If they consume the shed skin, hair, nail trimmings, etc., of their master, they’ll take on some of their master’s power.
3That they are immortal so long as their master lives.
4A boundless belief in the fundamental goodness of everyone else.
5Clinical lycanthropy they lapse into when frightened or surprised.
6That their master is the only one they can trust and everyone else is a spy or saboteur.
7That their master is watching everything they do.
8That their master is a god and they must invent rites and taboos to avert their master’s wrath.
9That the world is ending tomorrow (always tomorrow, never today) and that everyone should act like it.
10That avoiding all sexual behaviours and displays will allow them to accumulate vital essence.
11That everyone secretly serves their master, and any obstacles are only competition for their master’s favour.
12That they are a demonic entity summoned by their master as a familiar.
13That eating pieces of art will make them more beautiful.
14That you can know everything there is to know about a person from their handshake.
15That all actions are permissible if you are polite while doing them.
16That the existence of the supernatural is a baseless superstition.
17That time is exactly cyclical and that they remember every event that has or will ever happen.
18That love and compassion burn them like acid.
19That they’re your (and everyone else’s) long-lost twin, forsaken for their dreadful superiority.
20That children are treacherous and seek to replace adults through secret violence.
D20This Wretched Servant Mostly Serves By...
1Preparing and administering horrific poisons.
2Offering pathetic and profuse praise.
3Acting as their master’s messenger and herald.
4Kidnapping their master’s enemies’ loved ones.
5Collecting tribute, by force if necessary.
6Performing fell magic too dangerous for their master to risk.
7Constructing and operating cruelly ingenious machines.
8Rousing mobs and misdirecting vexations.
9Spreading lies and conspiracies.
10Immortalizing their master’s deeds in song.
11Luring the credible to their doom.
12Liasioning with other malicious types.
13Leading squads of other minions.
14Handling beasts and acquiring more and more dangerous sorts.
15Sagely advising on many fields of expertise.
16Organizing improbable heists.
17Acting as a bodyguard.
18Providing a legitimate front to underhanded enterprises.
19Enacting gruesome assassinations.
20Designing their master’s hideouts and lairs.

No comments:

Post a Comment